A few days ago I posted about my recent ADHD diagnoses on Instagram. I wasn’t sure that I wanted to post about it, but when I started my account, I promised to always be open and vulnerable. It was freeing. I felt like I had been hiding my truth and now that it’s out, I am so happy and at peace.

But I didn’t always feel that way.

Last year, a friend at work started to open up to me about her ADHD diagnoses. More and more, I started to say “wait, I do that too.” After a few months, I decided to bring it up to my therapist, after I had searched the web for ADHD symptoms. I took the DSM test and hit all but two of the markers. So I saw a psychiatrist. And she agreed. So I started medication.

I’ve been on the medication since October and it has been life changing.

At first, I was nervous about taking medication. I was scared that it was going to change me. That I wouldn’t be the same. I was worried I wouldn’t be me. But it just enhanced who I am. It took away my sadness and frustrations and shined a light on who I truly am. Without these medications, I wouldn’t be as happy.

I can focus, I remember things now, I can start projects at work and finish them without stressing about how late I waited to start them, I remember people, social gatherings don’t stress me out anymore, I can stop talking and breath, I don’t interrupt people as much, I can keep my apartment clean, my sleep has improved, and my brain just feels more clear.

Looking back, I wish I had been diagnosed earlier in life. These symptoms aren’t new. I’ve been like this my whole life. I can remember searching “what is wrong with me,” in high school because I was sick of “being this way.” I was sick of saying stupid things without thinking, I was sick of losing friends and failing tests. I remember falling into a dark place in high school because I hated who I was. I hated the way I was and was constantly trying to change.

There was nothing wrong with me.

Being diagnosed with ADHD explains everything. It brought so much comfort and peace to my life. And I can’t help but think if I would have been diagnosed earlier, none of those dark thoughts would have happened. However, I am thankful for my path. Without it, I would not be the strong person I am today. Without the struggles, I wouldn’t know what I know now. I’m thankful for being diagnosed when I did. It’s later than some, but earlier than most women.

There is nothing wrong with me.

Having ADHD is a superpower. My brain works differently. I am creative and can hyper focus on tasks and learn new skills fairly easy. After watching a new movie or show, I can deep dive the actors for hours. If I learn a new craft, my friends and family will have gifts coming their way all the time. I am really good at being alone. If I start something new, I throw myself into it and it becomes my whole life, even just for a period of time.

If you're like me, and have ADHD, or ADD, OCD, or whatever special trait you’ve got, there is nothing wrong with you. There never was anything wrong with you. You are special. If anything, people who don’t have a superpower are the weird ones.